After Visiting Friends by Michael Hainey

A Son's Story

My son, Saleem gave this book as a present to me. A graduating dramatic writer, he  thought this would be a good read for me. It tells the journey a son has traveled to know more about his father.
Saleem thought it would be a good read for me as it was for him.  

I am glad I read it. It brings every one closer to their fathers and sons, and their mothers. 

Orphaned at an early age in his life, the author grew up under the shadow of his older brother, single mom and grandparents. Remembering one early morning his uncle and grandparents coming to their house and telling his mother about his father's death, he had to live with this shorthand version of truth; and he always struggled with it.

He was always fascinated with his father's life cut short, and how it would have been different for him. I know a few friends of mine who grew up without their fathers and one could see the similarities in their lives and the author. It is painful, tough and full of imaginations, both wishful and dreadful.

Theirs was a family of journalists and writers. It is a story of immigrants of another generations. How a son of Irish  and a daughter of Polish immigrants meet up in a newspaper room. How his grandfather landed in Nebraska on an orphan train from NY and started a carrier as a rail-man. His sons moved to Chicago and became journalists. How it was growing up Polish in Chicago and their daughter found her way in the news business.

As the author grew older, his quest to find more about his father and the circumstances around his death grew. By the time he developed enough courage to start looking for answers, when he had outlived his father's age,  many characters who would have known more had already passed on.  This journey took him to many places and persons involved in the life of his father. 

He does get hold of a family secret but then gets no headway. He gets stonewalled by everybody. Old guys stick together and protect what they think should be protected. Even those in the profession of seeking and speaking the truth are not exceptions.

Finally the break comes as a result of an act of kindness by someone full of faith and in return of offering a cup of sweet tea, separated in time. That leads him ultimately to the truth. 

Although it is comforting to know the truth, it does not provide closure he was looking for. He has to know more and by doing so touches the lives of many more.

And then he has to face how to tell his mother about what he knows. He started this journey to find more about his father and ends up knowing a lot about his mother. 

Written as an investigative story, the real essence of the book is in the details of what goes in the mind and heart of a growing child. Real and imagined, thoughts about his father and depth of sentiments around that. Feelings of love, abandonment, anger, and in the end a closure. 

You have to be sure what you are getting into. Knowing the truth may be a lot difficult than one can think of. If you have the courage to face the truth, whatever it may be, go for it. Otherwise there are enough distractions in life to keep you occupied.

Michael Hainey is a deputy editor of GQ

Flamenco in New York

FLAMENCO FESTIVAL

AT THE 

MECCA TEMPLE

aka

NEW YORK CITY CENTER

https://www.flickr.com/photos/nasirgondal/sets/72157642131701433/

Ever since I had seen the dome from the room in Hilton NY during an APPNA Meeting I had an interest to know about the building and go inside it.

Mecca Temple

It is a fascinating story. Build by the The Ancient Arabic Order of the Nobles of the Mystic Shrine, later simply called Shriners, build it in early 1900. This was an offshoot of Freemasons, who felt inspired by the Middle Eastern and Moorish art and customs.

Two Americans Walter Flemming, a physican, and William Florence, an actor, wanted to create a branch of Masons with more fun and purpose in mind and less of rituals. Florence, on a tour to England was invited to a party arranged by an Arab diplomat. He got inspiration from that and on coming back floated this idea.
Today the most obvious contribution of the Shriners are the Hospitals. They are headquartered in Tempa Florida.

There is a story that they used to have their events in Carnegie Hall but were evicted as they smoked cigars too much. They later bought this piece of land, just south of the Carnegie Hall. The Muslim influence reflected in the Shriner rites and dresses. Fez is their head gear. Similar influence is heavily reflected in the architecture. You see Andalusian horseshoe arches, and various Islamic Motifs in the inside. The auditorium was built to earn extra money for concerts and shows. 

The Center Stage

ES SELAM ELEIKUM

اسلام عیلکم

Later during the Depression, they were unable to pay the mortgage and the Bank foreclosed on them. Later the City took over the building as a lot of back taxes were owed.  

The rumor is that the building was to be demolished but the mayor, F LaGuardia came up with the plan of converting it into NY City Center. Now it is a major venue for dance performances.

Then came the information in the mail for the Flamenco Festival. This is an annual event, held in this center for the last decade or so.

I watched Flamenco for the first time during our trip to Seville in 2012. More on that  at http://ghareebkhana.blogspot.com/2012/10/seville-alshabilah-of-andalucia.html

There I learned about the Roma people. Believed to be originally from Punjab or Rajistan in India they eventually found their way to Spain and rest of Europe. These Gypsies, as they are called, developed this unique form of art which is reminiscent of Indian and Middle Eastern music. 

This was a four day event, and Sunday was the last day. It was good to be out on a nice day after a long wintery and snowy spell.

 

Zoha and I attended the performance by Eva Yerbabuena. 

The show was titled Lluvia ie Rain. It is the story of a person born on a gray day of pure melancholy. She explores isolation, loneliness, heartbreak, ignorance and acceptance. It was a Ballet Flamenco, and had all what flamenco has to offer: the long dirges reminding of either aazan or a lonely song of a desert-man, the dance, the guitar, the drums, the hand clapping, the castanets and the quintessential stomping of the feet. 

A video clip  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nn3hzMx_88Y

As mentioned by Barclay.

Created by Yerbabuena, a choreographer as well as the virtuoso dancer most people know, Lluvia, meaning Rain, is a full-evening flamenco drama featuring a cast of five dancers and an ensemble of superb musicians and singers.

Like flamenco itself, the production of Rain traverses an intense range of emotions. It begins with a somber street scene in which Yerbabuena and her dancers thread their way through an unseeing crowd conveying a mood of melancholy and isolation. It concludes with a blindingly passionate signature Soleá and an audience jolted into awareness of the great La Yerbabuena’s magisterial qualities.

I wished I had known the language; it would have added a lot to the experience. Still the rhythm, the movements and the music made my day. I can now understand why many non-Urdu-knowing people can enjoy the music of Nusrat Fateh Ali

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References:

• http://www.nycago.org/Organs/NYC/html/MeccaTemple.html
• http://www.shrinersinternational.org/Shriners/History/Beginnings
• http://www.thebarclay.org/events-details.asp?n=explore-events&n1=&n2=&refId=466B6716-3029-4479-A839-08C48A399E68
• http://ghareebkhana.blogspot.com/2012/10/seville-alshabilah-of-andalucia.html